Posted in current events, good news, Random thought, rant, religion


The Word from the Lord is INCREASE. Increase your Love for Him. Spend more time with Him.

Then you will be able to Increase your love for your mother, sister, wife or child.
Love as a verb! Increase face time with your wife.
Increase the romance! Don’t make her wait until the next holiday for intentional time. Don’t make it about sex – show her affection and attention just because.

Take mom out. Make her feel special (because she IS) not just on Mother’s Day.

Love on your sister, minister to her.

Increase your love Men!

Posted in childhood, humor


When I was four, I lived in dread of cat statue in my bedroom. Many, perhaps most nights, it would move from one side of the bedroom to the other. I would take a mental snapshot of it before going to sleep: eyes glowing, right on my nightstand. The following morning it would be at the other end of room! Sometimes the ominous glow would be gone as well. I fretted over how to describe this to my mom.

Months later I still hadn’t broached the subject with Mom. She unexpectedly brought it up Clearing her throat, she asked if I needed her to continue moving the cat? Perplexed, I asked what she meant. She repeated herself. All at once I understood that Mom was the one moving the cat statue! I found myself relived and annoyed.

“Mom, why did you do that? I became afraid that the cat was alive! Sheepishly she admitted that she moved the cat so that its glowing eyes would not scare me at night. Instead her furtive moving of the statue while I slept sent my imagination into overdrive. Peering at me, she asked a reasonable question: “Why didn’t you imagine that Mom or Dad might be moving the statue?”

Why indeed!

Posted in humor, Random thought


Little kids are absolutely amazed at everything you do. Kids believe every word. They boost your ego.

Teens don’t agree with anything you say. Teens find everything you do cringy. They deflate your ego.

Cats simply don’t care what you do.

Clearly, I should have just adopted a cat!

Posted in bible, Random thought, rant, religion

Disposable People

If you write people off after they offend you… You are basically saying people (or least relationships) are disposable. Are you?

Take the time to communicate why you feel offended. See if you can find mutual understanding. Whether the other party is contrite or arrogant – choose to forgive. God didn’t write us off! He offers us forgiveness. He sent Jesus to pay the price for every person who ever lived. Let’s do better.

Posted in childhood, humor


I took Naomi grocery shopping. For every Thanksgiving food item on our list, she got a random snack. As I finished placing the last of the groceries in our car two masked men came and grabbed our cart. I noticed a look of confusion and alarm on my thirteen year old’s face. I read her expression and knew exactly what she was thinking. She thought masked men were stealing our empty cart! I quickly explained they were doing their job; gathering up shopping carts. She breathed a sigh of relief. We laughed all the way home.

Posted in bible


Control Freaks, micro-managers – everyone knows one. Whether it’s your boss, your Father-in-law or your room mate, you may find yourself frustrated and perplexed with how to cope.

First of all, Control issues belong to the would be controller – not you. Don’t let them make their problems become yours.

Controllers are relentless due to deep insecurity.
Many lived in chaotic, toxic families where they had no say in anything. They often grew up feeling helpless.
Controllers will do anything to have at least the illusion of omnipotence. Controllers will wear you down if you allow them.
Often, they earnestly believe they are being helpful or efficient.

One problem with controllers is they think their way is the only, best possible way to get things done.

Some controllers make everything a matter of Life and Death. They spin far fetched but deadly scenarios. You have to wonder if they believe it or simply use these ‘What If?’ scenarios to manipulate people.

“I just want you to be safe/healthy!”
“This is the most efficient/effective way!”
“Don’t you want the best for our (family/company?) “

Controllers can’t be controlled.
If you suggest an alternative to them or poke holes in their rationale, they will accuse YOU of being the control freak!

There are lots of inappropriate ways to respond, if it’s a stranger you might be tempted to rudely put them in their place. What if the Controller is someone in authority? What if it’s a loved one? We should treat everyone with compassion and respect.

Matt 22:39  'love your neighbor as yourself.'

If YOU were the Controller, how would you hope to be treated?

Show them why what they do is inappropriate.
“I feel disrespected when you insist that I do _____ a specific way. Will you give me the freedom & dignity to do things my unique way?”

When you link their behavior with the effect it has on you, they have to stop trying to sell their way. They are forced to think about how you feel.
Speak calmly (even if you don’t feel calm!) Make eye contact. This should be done in person if possible, sometimes you may need to send them letter so that you can get a word edgewise! A written letter is better than a text message.

Maintain boundaries.
When they cross the boundaries (and they will) react calmly but firmly. Let them know that you appreciate their concern. Assure them you will take their input seriously. Remind them that you reserve the right to do something a different way – your way. Inform them if they get overzealous and begin trying to force their will on you, that you may need to take a mental health break away from them. This can be a few minutes or a week. This isn’t punishment but your way of maintaining your dignity and peace.

Every single time they try to take over the event planning or ‘help’ you make a minor/major decision calmly  hold up a hand and call a time out. Remind them of the boundaries you established. Thank them for their concern but tell them you are just fine.

Disengage and recharge.
Stop the  conversation  right then and there.  Tell them you need to leave. Don’t fall into a text argument. Ignore those text notifications!
If it’s a supervisor, be extra respectful and take a short  mental health or bathroom break.

Staying out worldly calm is important – especially if you dealing with a male Controller. They are more inclined to dismiss emotional responses as an over reaction.

Consistency is key, they may NEVER see the Light. If they know you won’t argue or give in,  they stop micromanaging out of expediency. By treating them  respectfully, you give them room to apologize if they see your point of view. Be respectful to gain respect.

Arguing is pointless, micromanagers are too in love with their way. Often, they can make getting their way sound reasonable. No lawyer can win versus a determined Controller!

Finally, if you find yourself being held accountable by someone as a micromanager or controller… Listen to them! Don’t dismiss their objections.
It’s fine to present your point of view. The problem is when you won’t take “No thanks.” as answer. If you keep ‘explaining’ why your way is best, you devalue the other person. If they tell you “Fine, you win!” You didn’t win and neither did they!

Micromanaging or controlling behavior damages professional and personal relationships.

Posted in bible

Tips for spiritual growth

2 Timothy 2:15 King James Version

15 Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.

For anyone wishing to grow spiritually I have a few suggestions.

1. Do the things God has already told you to do.
If you know that He wants you tithe, just do it. Stop trying to talk yourself out of tithing.

If He told you to join a Spirit led, Bible based church – don’t sit at home watching church – join!

Obedience to scripture helps you to understand scripture better. Often math makes more sense as you do the equations. Bible truth is the same. You see patterns and eventually the why behind the rule.

Obedience to God helps you to recognize His Voice.

2. Study as if you expect your pastor to ask you to preach. Study as if you have to explain it to a child. The struggle to understand the Bible is like lifting weights, your faith can’t help but grow. God will reveal Himself to you and you will find it more enjoyable.

I teach Sunday School, I run an informal Men’s Bible study and I lead a church small group. I never get tired of sharing with others. Each time that I ‘plateau’ I increase my challenge. I added Bible devotional at the family dinner table so that I’m forced to read scripture and listen to God daily. My family is expecting something so I am motivated!

3. If you have a blurry view of God. Get in a small group or Bible study. He will come into focus! The discussion will challenge your assumptions and surprise you with revelation. Anyone can get lost in a mega church. A small group setting is less threatening and more personal. You will find opportunities to try out spiritual concepts and get helpful feedback in a ‘safe’ place. The Church started out as small groups meeting from house to house. I strongly recommend this!